Reflection on Cambodia

Nathaniel was able to take two weeks off from work and travel a bit
with Nick and I. It was invaluable having time to hang out and talk
outside of the responsibilites of daily life. When in Yiliang
Nathaniel is working 7 days a week, which is normal for his company.
Business is very different here, it is very social. When the company
boss is in town Nathaniel must stay out until ten o'clock eating,
keeping him company and entertaining. The night usually begins with a
big dinner, multiple plates that everyone picks from with chopsticks,
a lot of toasting, alcohol consumption and kareoke afterwards or a
foot rub. Nick and I had the pleasure of participating in a "business
meeting" that ended with singing I will always love you and eating,
eating, eating at a KTV center. It was pretty awesome for us but
when late nights with co-workers and bosses becomes a frequent
obligation I understand why my brother sometimes hates it.

Camodia: Speak Khmer language which is made of 30 consonants and 32
vowels and dipthongs combintions! what?! However, there are no tones
like in Chinese so there is hope for the average westerner. The main
method of transportation is tuktuk (sp?) which is a small carriage
built over a moped. The tuktuk drivers can be relentless when it
comes to finding business but most will accept a firm no and a nice
buddhist bow. These drivers may also try to cheat the foreigners out
of a few bucks or two by charging more than the usual price. Though
paying an extra dollar or two may not seem like a big deal for most of
us it creates a pattern for the next foreigners who come after you and
throws the local economy off. Let's pretend I am in a hurry to get to
the bus station so I find a local tuk tuk driver and hand him the
equivalent of $10 upon arrival. A local would pay $5 for the same
trip. I have not only been a fool and overpaid but have set a new
standard. Perhps the next time this driver takes a trip to the bus
station he will ask for $10 maybe expect it. However, this time the
passenger may not be able to afford the doubled price or not know the
difference and get cheated. It seems a small act but the economic
choices of foreigners and travelers affect a communit in deep, yet
subtle ways. Traveling in Cambodia made us more aware of how we were
spending, spending wisely, and knowing where our money was going. It
is easy to become frivilous with our money and there may be times we
don't realize how our tendencies to fling money in whatever direction
instantly gratifies our needs affects other people, especially in
developing countries like Cambodia. Lonely planet warns that in
southeast asia (some places more than others) foreigners are seen as
walking ATM machines. Cambodia is still fairly innocent in this
respect (especially when compared with Vietnam). Most Cambodians
were extremely sincere and could not help but smile if you did the
buddhist bow in their direction. It was awesome.
Something very wise about my brother is how he spends money. It
was always his tendency to buy from the local mom and pop places, to
eat local, and support hard working people and see the consequence of
how one spends money.
One of the most intense moments in Cambodia came one night when we
were eating on the sidewalk outside of our hostal. A small boy came
up beside me, half hidden by a decorative plant. He said something in
Khmer but I thought he said, "Sarah." I spun around and saw his sad
face. Those of you who know me well, know that I am jumpy and get
spooked easily. I was freaked out. I kept myself from screaming. We
assumed he wanted money but probably needed food more. My brother
thought that he was probably forced to beg by an adult who was also
probably watching nearby. The initial urge is to throw the boy a few
bucks (whats a few bucks to an American?). But if we stop to think,
most likely that money will not go to the boy at all. It will go to
the adult. The best way to help that sad boy standing in front of you
is to invite him to your table and buy him the biggest plate of fried
rice you can. Most likely, this will not happen b/c the boy lacks
self confidence and is being watched. So you pack the rice in a to go
bag, smile a prayer and send him along.
If we needed a tuktuk driver my brother would ignore the guy
yelling and stalking foreigners outisde of their hotels for business
and find the driver (a bit outside of the tourist district) waiting
with a bit of dignity. Once the driver is found, no matter the
quality of the man, the first price is never the actual price and it
is assumed that both parties know this. You MUST bargain! You must
say, "This is too much" and pretend to walk away. You must give a
lower price, much lower. And wait for, "Come back! I agree."
Sometimes, we walk away and find someone else and sometimes we hear
the return and we set about our business with the fair price. It is a
game and it is so weird until you get use to it. Then, maybe, it is
fun. Case in point, there is nothing like being from a wealthy
nation traveling in a developing country to make you realize that HOW
YOU SPEND MONEY MATTERS AND IT AFFECTS PEOPLE AOROUND YOU.
Cambodia is still heavy in Buddhism and you can see it every
morning when buddhist monks pass through the streets collecting alms
from homes and businesses. They do not buy food. They are supported
by the community. Cambodians who wish to give, greet the monks
outisde with a plate of food and in return recieve a spiritual
blessing. My guide book said that monks are not allowed to touch
women so I always felt more self consicous when I was near them,
knowing my clumsy tendencies to fall and topple without intention.
Maybe a bit of was a part of me daring myself to touch a monk.
(Whatever, you know you would think that too).
Also, because society is saturated in spirituality the standard
greeting is two palms touching, a smile and a bow. It is so well
recieved here and I saw it turn dozens of hard glazes starting at me
into a warm smile with dozens of wrinkles.

Last bit: not all of Cambodia is sunshine, sweat and smiles. In the
70s there was a
horrendous genocide that most people don't know about. We went to a
place called the "Killing Fields" one day, which is just what it says.
Fields where thousands of Cambodians were killed. Some for being
part of the old political regime but many for being intelligent,
doctors, having degrees, being teachers or friends and family
associated with such people. Search "Khmer Rouge" if you're
interested in more information.

The second week of our trip was Vietnam but I do not have the energy
to give my thoughts on that place now. Thank you for reading (if you
made it this far) and caring about all of this. It feels great to
write it out and I hope you appreciate Cambodia.